16Deep

POONCON RED vs Dime Bag Swagger Gordons:

BEAST.  FUCKING.  MODE.  Marshawn Lynch's 4 touchdowns against the hapless New York Football Giants salvaged what could have been a Miloing from Chip and Ashley's formerly 1-loss team.  POONCON didn't have much to work with as Julian Edelman was on a bye, Colin Kaepernick has forgotten that Vernon Davis is open, and Sammy Watkins was coming off a groin injury.  But her waiver wire rejects were able to put together enough points to withstand Jordy Nelson's dominating performance against the Chicago Bears (a game that makes Emma very very sad).  However, Chip and Ashley's faith and trust in Jay Cutler against the Green Bay Packers was misplaced and not even Mark Sanchez and his sudden offensive output was able to propel Cody Parkey to make a difference on Monday night.  Ashley's declaration that she'd "rather the Green Bay Packers lose than lose in fantasy football" was all futile.  POONCON RED defeats Dime Bag Swagger Gordons 106.5 - 98.5 to inch closer to first place in her division.

Trix of The Trade vs RG300 Thread Counts:

One of the most frustrating things about fantasy football is when you literally start the best lineup possible for your roster, score enough points to have beaten 11 of the 16 teams in the league, and still lose to the second highest scoring team of the week... sadly this was the story of Trix of the Trade's week.  After allegedly throwing Week 9 by starting Geno Smith as a QB, the RG300 Thread Counts put together a dominant team to cling to first place in her division, much to POONCON RED's dismay.  Clearly Aaron Rodgers is a better QB than any Jets QB.  Not even garbage time touchdowns from Kelvin Benjamin on Monday night could offset the inability of the Carolina Panthers defense to stop Mark Sanchez and the Philadelphia Eagles.  (Was that sentence really just written?  Guess so.)  Hopefully, the return of Josh Gordon will revitalize Team Trix.  RG300 Threat Counts defeats Trix of the Trade 127.5 - 107.

#Kai ThxBai vs O Kaeptain! My Kaeptain!:

Mark Sanchez scoring more points than Drew Brees... who would've thought that?  After deliberating about her own QB situation, #Kai ThxBai wisely settled for Brees over Carson Palmer who ended up tearing his ACL.  Guess there will be no more QB controversy from here out for Alex and her team.  This game very well could have been the Miloing of the week as most of #Kai ThxBai's team forgot out to football and O Kaeptain! My Kaeptain! managed to be the third highest scoring team this week.  There was simply nothing else to do, but watch this train wreck as it unfolded.  The 120 - 55 loss by #Kai ThxBai drops them to 5-5 as O Kaeptain! My Kaeptain! climbs out of their divisional cellar.

Handegg Hooligans vs Party Like a Gronk Star (The Miloing of The Week):

Oh how the mighty have fallen.  The defending champions didn't even bother trying to field a full team during her bye week hell while the Hooligans put together a very strong team, one the few that would have defeated Trix of the Trade.  The Gronk Stars are well on their way to going from Worst to First to Worst as they sit tied for the worst record in the league with a 113 - 34 defeat.  I could write more, but if Durete don't care enough to field a full team, sorry Jack, this doesn't merit more than this.

Legatron Prime vs Beast A La Mode:

The Week 10 byes decimated Legatron Prime, but the team he was able to field handed Beast A La Mode a sound defeat as Brian left quite a few points on the bench.  However, if it was any consolation, even if A La Mode managed to start the perfect team from his roster, he still would not have been able to defeat Legatron Prime.  Not sure what's worse, that or the plight of Trix of the Trade.  Although, the lack of depth is no more apparent than seeing that Timothy Wright of the New England Patriots is the only TE on A La Mode's roster.  Legatron Prime defeats Beat A La Mode 80.5 - 52.5.

Commissioner Josh Gordon vs Elevated Conflict:

This season has not been kind to former league champions... or to league commissioners.  Commissioner Josh Gordon emerged victorious in this week's battle of commissioners past and present.  After an abysmal start to the season, it seems like the current Commish's roster is finally starting to click as he fielded this week's highest scoring team.  Who knew Jordan Matthews of the Eagles would score nearly as much as Peyton Fucking Manning?  Commissioner Josh Gordon hands Elevated Conflict its third loss in a row 128.5 - 92.5.

Washington Mullets vs Dumpster Grill: 

The Mullet's faith in the New York Giants this week was just about as misplaced as anyone who started Chicago Bears players as his team turned into a dumpster fire for the Dumpster Grills.  Both teams didn't have many players to choose from as Week 10 byes made for slim pickings.  Solid performances by the Atlanta Falcons' Roddy White (the bane of many teams last season) and Cecil Shorts III of the Jacksonville Jaguars (REALLY!?) helped propel the Dumpster Grills to a 77.5 - 57.5 victory.

Turn Down for Watt vs I Don't Remember the Titans (The Heartbreak of the Week):

This game came down to the wire on Monday night as Big Ben Rapelisberger wasn't able to duplicate his 6-TD games this week, but instead played like he was Jay Cutler.  There was a point when Blake Bortles of the Jaguars was actually doing better until the late TD by Big Ben.  Solid performances by Ben Tate, Greg Olsen, and Emmanuel Sanders were not able to overcome the destruction caused by the Eagles Defense against the Carolina Panthers.  The Titans (much like their pseudo-NFL namesake) managed to rip a loss from the jaws of victory as Turn Down for Watt emerged with a 90 - 87 victory.  

There's still plenty of football left as we start hitting the home stretch of the season... who will emerge on top?  Who will bear the shame of being Bears-like?  And will Emma stop asking rhetorical questions?  Who cares.  Football.  Boom.